The first time I felt reality slip away was the sixth day at the hospital. I had driven home, a 20 minute drive, to get more clothes and take a shower. This was my first time alone after arriving in the ER that early Sunday morning six days earlier. I didn’t want to leave my husband, but I needed more clothes…

The drive to Flagstaff was a blur. I had driven that canyon road thousands of times, but this time I don’t remember the scenery or the cars I passed. I only remember praying that Steve would survive the 10 minute helicopter ride. I didn’t know what I would encounter when I got to the hospital…

We arrived at the hospital early the next morning to find our stern Dr. Schrieber waiting for us. The news wasn’t good. Something had bothered him all night, so he came back to the hospital and poured over Steve’s blood work again. He hadn’t seen anything that unusual the night before, but something kept tugging at him…

Once the choice to not receive phone calls was made, I began to become much more aware of my hospital experience and began to make even more empowering choices. I had noticed one day as the doctor of the day was standing at the foot of Steve’s bed telling us about his condition that Steve’s heart…

It was around our tenth night in Flagstaff when I had a dream about how life looks when it changes. It was a simple dream. I was looking out a window into a dark night when suddenly there was a large explosion. It was massive and debris flew everywhere. I knew it was Steve’s life…